Love within darkness
by kuchikifan
Summary: she was not your normal heroine nevertheless she had kindness and love to show.
1. Chapter 1

**Dasha's POV**

I was walking through the military academy halls, accompanying my direct commanding officer to the last exam. I really didn't want to be there but what to do I couldn't go against that man orders. In all truth I was fed with my commander officer I wanted to change squads again. I'm picky in something you supposedly couldn't be but I always got transferred. Just like I wanted guess my boss didn't like what my attitude become but I was lucky I didn't got discharged. That's because as they always said before I changed squads "the army of the Barsburg empire cannot lose a soldier with your level of skills therefore you will be transferred to…" and on and on he went till in the end I gladly accepted my transference. The reason for why I wanted to transfer so badly was because I couldn't handle my commander officers in my case if I had to have a boss and I still had to I wanted him to be strong not like the men I had come across till now. The same happened with the previous boss was happening now in the end he wasn't what I wanted.

When I came out from my thoughts I already was inside the room were the exam would take place. I observed everyone around the room, the conversations were the same as always futile military talk that lead nowhere this was what I thought. But you still had to take part , smiling politely and nodding .I really couldn't bother more, I was all about the action.

"Sir, could I ask what is the holding up?" I asked politely.

"We're waiting for the Chief of Staff. He must be arriving soon" my boss answered" you just have to wait a little bit more, Dasha"

" Yes,sir" you responded politely.

Just after this the students were allowed to go in. Getting ready to begin as the criminal was allowed in too.

Weren't we waiting for the Chief of Staff, guess he must have arrived. Ayanami the chief of staff, a warsfeil just like me . Indeed powerful and I always thought he was the perfect boss for me but I never got in his personal staff the black hawks, in all respect my skills were more than enough. This was what I thought. But now I decided to stand there and do what I should that was observe the exam .

**General POV **

So there she stood with her white skin like porcelain, lips just of the fitted color, eyes of profound dark grey, hair black as the night with straight bangs and that ran down over her shoulder blades and body that showed all the training she went through, even through her uniform, thus she was fit and nevertheless scars were nonexistent. In eyes of men one could say she was a beautiful and confident woman.

Suddenly the doors of the observation room opened again. The Chief of Staff had arrived with his staff and just like the other officers you saluted them on the forming rows.

After that she just watched as she was supposed to.

**Kaya's POV**

At the end the kid didn't want to kill the criminal. "What is he doing? If he doesn't kill him he might be dangerous to him. It shows weakness."I said in a barely audible voice. Nevertheless Ayanami heard it and a small smirk appeared on his face however he only agreed with the weakness part. Then he proceed inside were the students were and just killed the criminal. "You're weak" he said. My eyes widened I wasn't expecting what he just did. "Indeed weak" I said just like before as I sighed with my eyes closed. " Dasha! We are ready to leave please come"my commander officer asked.

"I'm going now sir" I answered as I followed.

**General POV**

"Who is that black haired woman?" Ayanami asked to his staff with his usual monotone voice.

" Aya! Aya-tan is interested in a woman. She is indeed beautiful" Hyuuga said in his normal kind of playful tone and manner. Ayanami just showed him an expression that showed that isn't the reason.

"Lieutenant commander Dasha Imai. Skilled above average in combat thus can complete tasks alone were at least 10 normal officers or more were necessary. Therefore it is said she is a warsfeil . It seems that she transfers a lot, the reason is she suddenly changes her behavior and becomes more and more defiant of commander officer power. " Katsuragi recited, the truth is that Dasha was quite known among the military.

"Eeh! Interesting woman. Isn't she" Kuroyuri said.

"I see. For the next assignment. Ask for soldiers from that squad. Surely she will be sent." Ayanami said as they headed away too.

" Aya-tan wants to evaluate her. New team member coming" Hyuuga said.

"Don't think she will be good Ayanami-sama" Kuroyuri said

"She will it is a presentiment." Ayanami said with a slight smile as he sat down

By now Dasha was oblivious of what was happening as she worked in her office.


	2. Chapter 2

**Dasha´s POV**

" Dasha can you come here, please" my boss asked. I politely obeyed and headed towards his desk. I was truly puzzled did I do something wrong with my paperwork, if I remembered well I had no mission whatsoever.

"What's wrong, sir?" I asked worried

"Everything is alright. Do not worry. A request came for a mission; please do take care of it. You will be in charge of our men. Take care" he said as he handed me some papers "you head off to antwort in 3 days so please get ready soon".

"Okay sir I'll do just that." I said complying asI read the documents lightly just to get an idea of what it was. As soon as I saw what it was my heart skipped a bit. I would work with ayanami. Ok maybe he wouldn't directly talk to me but at least he would be there in the same ship.

Moments later I walked away with a stack of papers to deliver I did that and then I decided I should have lunch. So I headed to the cafeteria asked what I wanted and then sat down. Finally resting since morning that had been chaotic with more and more paperwork so I had no time to relax.

**General POV**

"Hi! Dasha" my only true friend Tomo-chan said as she sat down right in front of jolted as she was were truly distracted." Hey I'm not that scary" Tomo said playfully . She was the opposite of Dasha. Cheerful, loud but not too much, sometimes she tried to skip work just because it was too good of a weather to work, she was blond with blue eyes and she mostly did office work. Dasha always wondered why thy got along so well.

"You're not scary. I was distracted" she said bluntly.

"How mean" Tomo said still playfully. Dasha looked at her with a tired face however Tomo's playfulness always helped her cheer up.

"You seem tired. Something wrong?" She asked seriously now.

"Just too much work and now a mission popped up " Dasha plainly said.

" I see, I'm overworked too. But what's your mission" she asked suspicious because Dasha's eyes glinted slightly as she mentioned her mission.

"The Chief of Staff asked for more people from our squad. Boss sent me to lead 200 people and help with the situation in Antwort" she explained

"Now I understand you get to work with Ayanami" Tomo said with a teasing smile.

"Stop it you know it's not like that. I just would like to work with him" Dasha shyly said "but only 200 men it isn't much. I really don't understand" she ended.

" I really don't know what you see in him " now Dasha just showed an annoyed face and Tomo stopped and changed subjects" maybe he was just short on troops and that much will suffice. Don't over think it. It has nothing to do with you" she stated and Dasha nodded.

" Aya-tan! Good news! Dasha-chan's paperwork just arrived her boss consented a battalion. She will be the leader. I want to see her fighting" Hyuuga said in his normal tone

" I see this is good. I'm sure she will be helpful" Ayanami stated seated on his desk as he got the papers Dasha had sent. By now he really didn't know why he had all this interest in you after you only saying one little sentence that wasn't meant to be heard. Meanwhile Dasha waswalking back to the office laughing with Tomo. "Really you should take initiative. You should've just go and give the papers yourself instead of sending them. I don't understand you on battle you seam unfazed but delivering paperwork to guy you want/love you can't. "Really amazing" she continued teasing Dasha.

"Just stop Tomo. I don't want him like that or love him and I said I had no time to deliver them." Dasha answered.

"Fine have it your way. Have nice day" she said with a smile as she went in her office and Dasha continued down the hall till her own.

**Dasha's POV**

Finally the mission day had come and I really had no dialogue whatsoever with Ayanami's staff or even with the said man. I was really busy those 3 days.

I was already ready. Men positioned as I was asked by them as well as the way ships would be designated. Now I was sitting on a bench waiting near the battle ship. Truth to be told I was sleepy it was just too early for me and I had little to no rest. I occasionally yawned. Sometimes it crossed my mind why I had to get ready so much time before the black hawks appeared. And the officer helping just wouldn't stop nagging me. Really now everything was in place there was no need for anything more. "Just calm down. Everything is fine now. They won't bite" I said with a calm smile to the officer "go back to your post and relax". Finally some peace and quiet . I sighed.

"ma'am" someone called. And I did not recognize this voice as I slowly opened my eyes from a second of peace. "Forgive me. I'm aware that you are not from this battalion but we've already arranged everything we could as normal. However there is some stuff missing and lieutenant Hyuuga hasn't appeared yet. So we ask you if could help us end" this man ended explaining after I nodded saying I was listening.

"I'll see what I can do from the info I got. Please show me the way" I said.

**General POV**

"You already have everything ready" Hyuuga said " Dasha –chan right .Thank you". He continued as he saw Dasha come out of a ship with an officer that then parted ways with her.

"Yes you're right. I'm Dasha-SAN" she said with emphasis on the san. He did not have the right to call her chan just yet. He was surprised with her, she was more direct than he thought.

"Do you want to say something "he asked because she seemed to be in thought. Yes of a matter of fact she was trying to choose her words.

"Yes. I have everything done. Thanks to you I had no rest whatsoever" she said making him smirk at her tiny tantrum. However she did not notice that Ayanami and the rest of his staff were approaching.

"If there is some other occasion that we work together could come to work properly on time, I really wouldn't like to have to do it all mine and your job altogether with the same lot of time. "She ended serious and with a slightly scary work smile. If he thought you were funny before not as uptight he thought she was before now he was surprised.

"Well said, lieutenant Imai." She froze on the spot. This voice belonged to Ayanami. She recognized it from the day of the exam. But if she froze Hyuuga now realized he was being scolded by his boss through what you said. Really now was she him in female form.. Just after she quickly saluted him correctly " lieutenant commander Dasha Imai . At your command, sir"

"uumm. Truly professional and respectful" Kuroyuri thought to him about you. And yes she was professional she always tried to do her best and she was loyal to the army and country. In this point was just like Ayanami.

**Dasha's POV**

Moments later I was aboard of the battleship leaning against the corner of the big window gazing at the vast calming blue sky. I loved looking at the sky I didn't well know why maybe because it soothed and calmed me. And it was the best I could do now I was nervous and that was not usual. I didn't grasp why. When I was talking to lieutenant commander Hyuuga that I didn't even know I was alright but as soon as the rest of his colleagues and Ayanami came I became like this . Suddenly it hit me was it like Tomo-chan said I loved, I wanted Ayanami, the Chief of Staff_. "Impossible. It's just admiration. Don't listen to silly Tomo"_ I silently chuckled to myself with my eyes closed_." Really. now why would I think something like that" _

" Dasha-san could you come here." Ayanami asked as he pulled me out of my silent ramblings. But however I rationalized like that my heart skipped a bit one that I did not placed importance that time just before I answered " yes, sir".

Hope you liked!


	3. Chapter 3

**Hi! It's me kuchikifan. Thank you all that reviewed I really appreciate it. Also thank you all that chose to follow my story and added to the favorites and advised me. I'm going to follow those advices. **

**Thank you again everyone! Now here's the next chapter. Hope you like it!**

I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply . I had been chosen to take care of the rebellious sklaves and it made me anxious. It had come to me as a surprise as I wasn't expecting to be chosen. After all I was just there to aid. it confused me. _" Don't over think it. It has nothing to do with you "_ Tomo words ran through my head again as to reason with me but I couldn't help to think that something was behind the reason to choose me. The moment I was called to talk with Ayanami was very clear in my mind as it had just happened a few hours ago however that was not the only reason why it still replayed in my mind. That wasn't the first time I had spoken with Ayanami but my heart beat like crazy, I was nervous , I felt shy, I struggled to maintain eye contact. I didn't understand why that happened. I sighed before opening my eyes.

" let's forget it . it doesn't matter now." I said to my myself. Before walking to an officer under my wing and finished all the preparations before heading out ship.

" Ma'am . we're ready."

" Good. Everyone you know the drill. Secure the perimeter and I'll take care of the rest. Remember do not get hurt and if you die… " I paused to open my mouth a second later. " I'll kill you myself afterwards" I ended stern. "_I do not like to lose my men_." It felt frustrating and I felt awful when I had to inform their family . I didn't deal well with these situations. I was very clumsy . The expressions on their faces and the feelings those meant were excruciating to witness. For me it was even worse as I had been on the other side of the conversation once as well.

" eh!" Hyuuga exclaimed. I sincerely thought that he had annoying me as his personal mission. " Why all this fuss?" he asked in his usual manner. I exhaled tiredly just to open my mouth afterwards " what fuss?" I said playing dumb.

" I meant your men deployment" Hyuuga answered playing along with me.

"Ah" I calmly exclaimed " That it's just a safety measure. I'll take care of the sklaves" I ended. He smirked.

" ma'am are you there?" a voice came from a radio. I realized everything was ready now. " yes. Is the path clear for me to proceed?" The machine clicked as I waited for my answer. Hyuuga standing by my side. Another click and… " Positive you can now proceed ma'am" . I smiled. All went well. I pushed the button to give my reply " understood. The last proceedings are now under way." I ended. Then walked towards other machine these one was the control panel to the major gates of the warship. " Dasha-chan do you need help?" Hyuuga asked playfully but Teasing . I was looking puzzled at the control panel buttons having no time to scowl at how Hyuuga addressed me. _" which one is the front gate?"_ I frowned then looked over to Hyuuga reluctant to ask for help. I never dealt well with any kind of machine whatsoever. Well except for the radio.

" I believe you're looking for this one"I gasped in surprise as a deep smoky voice rang through my hears. Coming from behind me I saw a gloved hand pushing down a big black button down. My head rotated to confirm the owner identity. Realizing who it was I shied away for the second time this day.

" T-Thank you, " I stuttered . what was happening to me? My heart was racing. "A-Ayanami-sama". I could swear I saw him smirk before I headed out onto the field.

I ran towards the opening exit gaining some velocity before I jumped out of the ship and blocked the previous anxiety of my thoughts. Now was not the time to be distracted as now lives were on stake.

As I hit the ground I noted the sklaves were at least confident on their victory because I saw smirks appearing on their face and growing wider when they realized that I was only one person but also a woman. Really being a woman on the army sometimes was ungrateful so there were hardly any.

I smiled mischievously. Sometimes this prejudice against women could be used as an advantage but normally it boiled my patience. I dodged, as the first enemy came at me with a punch, while unsheathing my sword. My swift movement hit the first of my assailants and others that quickly came to help after I dodged.

Then their movements stopped as somehow they were assessing me. I took a deep breath to somehow gain more concentration looking around with my eyes analyzing and assessing what to do next.

**General POV**

From above the skies trained eyes were interestingly and keenly watching her. Ayanami and his staff were observing how Dasha operated. Yet inside Ayanami's mind a struggle occurred one that ceased to exist long time ago. He was not only watching how she fought so he could evaluate her skills usefulness he somehow studied her. And when he meant studied her he meant the movements of her limbs, the lines of her body, the look in her eyes, how her hair flowed in the air and how her lips parted in a slight gasp for air. He recognized that for a longtime he had not gazed at a woman the way he gazed at her but he didn't show it in his face. Even when he remembered Dasha´s delightful reaction to him earlier he would not show a smirk on his lip or so he thought.

" She's doing fine isn't she Aya-tan?" Hyuuga teased aware of Dasha's and Ayanami's predicament but he would not incur his wrath however he couldn't resist a little poke.

" Yes she is" Ayanami declared on his normal tone head resting on his hand.

" I was worried you know. Dasha-chan seemed jumpy before going down there" Hyuuga continued. He meant when Ayanami helped her before.

" Is that so . I was not aware" Ayanami's smoky voice stated. He knew what Hyuuga was after and he would not hand it over easily or difficultly. "uhm… she uses defensive zaiphon. Surprising." _I thought she was the offensive type_. The first the time he met her came to his mind.

" _what is he doing ? if he doesn't kill him he might be dangerous to him. It shows weakness"you said in a barely audible voice._

**Dasha's POV**

Down on the field I was oblivious to the dialogue between the two men and proceeded with my mission. I raised my left hand to use my zaiphon. Defensive zaiphon that I used to form barriers somehow using them to attack. This time I used a large barrier as the enemies were many.

"Be still " I muttered to myself using barriers to immobilize the sklaves.

Quickly the remaining took action. There weren't many so I could take care of them with hand – to-hand combat. Well not quite I had my weapon.

When I finally knocked out the last one I wiped the few existing drops of sweat of my forehead before signaling my men to apprehend them. "Cease them. Coast clear" I said , with a hand raised on the air, more to myself than anyone else as my men were far away.

**General POV**

Up there on the ship the black hawks watched puzzled how Dasha took care of the rebellion with minimum casualties to say the least and her men efficiently apprehended the rebels seconds after she raised her hand


	4. Chapter 4

**Hi! Here's the new chapter of Dasha's story. I know it took a long time but I've been really busy with college and the chapters I published for other stories were already written, so this one took me longer. I also have a strong belief that my teachers were trying to kill me and my classmates but they failed as we're still alive and kicking! Ah! Ah!. Now continuing with one more chapter for Love within darkness. **

**Please enjoy! **

**Dasha's POV**

"Well I believe I have nothing further to say you executed your duty perfectly. You can go on your way lieutenant Dasha." Ayanami said from his chair behind his desk, his expression unreadable. It only added fuel to the fire because I couldn't get a read on his thoughts. Ayanami was starting to infuriate me, correction to frustrate me as I could not read him or read myself which had become more and more irritating. I didn't have a clue as to why I reacted that way to Ayanami. Asking Tomo-chan crossed my mind but I quickly scratched it from my options as she would definitely jump to weird conclusions.

"Dasha-san" My eyes widened slightly I was startled I had became too ingrained in my own thoughts. " Yes?" I managed. " Is there something you want to say?" Ayanami asked slightly smirking as he leaned back on his chair. " N-No." I said embarrassed my hand reaching for the door knob behind me. "Thank you sir. I'll take my leave" I ended before a small bow and leaving the room.

With fast strides I headed down the hall way fully intending to have a peaceful rest in my rom. When on my destination I slumped on the bed wishing for the much needed rest to come. Those days had been hellish namely because of Hyuugas' nagging, Kuroyuri cakes which made her faint but if I didn't eat them I think Kuroyuri would kill me, work in the ship that made me walk around all day and the last battle against the sklaves. But last but not the least actually the icing on the cake was my reaction to Ayanami's presence within two meters of me. Honestly when he was near me I was never myself. I would always be nervous around the said man therefore I couldn't maintain my calm behavior. Maybe it was because I wasn't used to have the person I admire around me most of the time so he wouldn't get out of my head." Yes that's it." I whispered to myself eased with my conclusion .

" _I just need to focus on the job as usual._" I thought dozing into sleep.

I really wished that sleep would come to soothe and ease me but I was wrong my wish wouldn't be granted albeit so simple. I was once again haunted with nightmares. My childhood and youth were not filled with good memories overlapping those where many horrid memories. Specially this one which still pursued me; the atrocious memory of the one who tried to murder me still child, as a child in my dream I could see that hideous man trying to stab me to death, I ran and ran, screamed till my voice escaped me. Until, until … I fell on the grounds of the garden of my family house he got closer… and closer to me, with no emotions in his eyes like I just was a piece of meat he could slice. I fell in my haste this time he managed to pierce my shoulder, blood flowed from the deep wound. It was still imprinted in my eyes, no wrong , in my soul… that moment in which he plunged his knife towards me to kill me…those maniac eyes . The knife never pierced through me. I remember I screamed with the whole strength I had left with my eyes closed and then with I opened them I saw the man lifeless on the ground. I trembled like leaf in a storm I had killed a man. My zaiphon I had used it to kill that man. It might not be a surprise for me now but at that time I had never done it. I had never manifested it with such intent and I always had needed profound concentration to use it. I never really understood how I did it that time. Next I only remember waking up in my aunties' arms.

I got up from bed hastily to splash my face with cold water. I wanted that nightmare to go away I had become strong I needn't to be afraid. Tired I went back to bed praying that I could sleep again however I ended only tossing and turning under the blankets. It was dark outside it was surely late and dawn was still far. Sighing I sat up on my bed maybe a walk around the ship will bring me to sleep. I got up and dressed only in my button up shirt and trousers left my room. Indeed my uniform wasn't worn properly but if didn't go near the control room it would be fine. I was sure I wouldn't run in anyone.

Wandering around I came across another panoramic window. I must've been at the other end of the warship , I remember this was the other location with such a thing. It was beautiful the view of the starry sky and the lights of the city below. I stayed watching for a while in l silence.

Before someone's' steps tore me out of my reverie. " Dasha-san" I heard has I turned around. My eyes widened in surprise I really thought I'd encounter no one. And now that I did it had to be him.

" Goodnight Ayanami-sama" I said with a slight bow. He just nodded in acknowledgement. " Is there something wrong ?"

**General POV**

Ayanami was enjoying the calm that the night´s sky brought with it until he heard steps on the corridors, from his seat it wasn't clear to whom the steps belonged but as minutes passed those came closer and then to a stop, but, now the Chief of Staff was fully aware of whom created them.

"Dasha" he whispered to himself, a devious glint went through his eyes. To the man that woman was an enigma because he didn't know why he was drawn to her. Well Ayanami wouldn't say drawn but, instead, intrigued by her. Dasha always had an endearing reaction to his presence nevertheless this reaction could change drastically to one of detachment. This was the way he saw it the truth was that Dasha was just trying to sort her own predicaments.

So all in all, interest, as Ayanami would put it, took the best of him, so he rose from the comfortable couch he sat on watching the night heading her way. When he came upon her he could finally call her name aloud and he did with his smoky voice. She quickly turned around with a bow. Sometimes it irritated him her formality towards him. And with his thought more questions formed in his mind. Ayanami nodded in acknowledgement his eyes closed. Why did it irritate him so? From anyone else it would have been irrelevant. There it was again her incongruity that had first come when she fought, he would follow her with his gaze and now he came to her. Still the last hit had yet to come. It came when he opened his eyes . She looked scared. Ayanami could not prevent the words to slip from his lips " Is there something wrong?"

Dasha was indeed startled with his appearance but that wasn't the only reason. She still had the images of the recent nightmare playing in her mind and not aware she was wearing her fear on her eyes. It was so uncharacteristic of her.

Dasha paused as to gather words to say, she wouldn't say what really was happening that would be disastrous. For some unknown reason Dasha definitely didn't want to look like a coward in front of that particular man. "Umm…I …." Dasha tried a hand running her hair. " Yes?" Ayanami intoned taking few steps to diminish the distance between them." Nothing's wrong, Ayanami-sama" Dasha tilted her head up as Ayanami's height was towering her." I just couldn't sleep" now she hid her face avoiding his stare fidgeting a little on her place.

" I see. Then did you think the night's sky would help you? It can indeed be calming." Ayanami said a softer tone underlying his voice that even he didn't recognize. Dasha turned to him. Was she imagining things? Or was Ayanami-sama trying to soothe her. No, that wasn't possible. So her lips cracked a sad smile in self admonishment there was no reason for that to happen as there was no reason why she would want that from her boss. Then, she replied, a sad gaze on her irises. "Yes that's true. However isn't that just one side of the coin?" Ayanami now fully turned to her Dasha did not avoid his intent look" Although I deem it beautiful I also find it dreadful in a way. The night hides many awful dangers, does it not?" Dasha explained her voice even and demure. Ayanami was now closer to her than he intended to be. Her speech had induced him to step closer, he couldn't explain why but he felt that Dasha had meant something more. Something linked with her. Ayanami moved a hand to touch her however he quickly stopped himself as her reaction was one of shock. "One should be able to protect himself in order to not be hurt." Dasha ended an edge to her voice. Again words spilled from Ayanami's lips before he could stop it .Holding her chin so she looked directly at him plainly ignoring her shock from before and from this minute, he said "Stay as you are… " Dasha hands now hovered above Ayanami's wrist unsure of what to do. " …or stay here and no harm will come to you. Be assure of that." Ayanami quickly removed his slick fingers turning around to leave with no further notice leaving a woman confused with his actions. He had left walking back to his room fuming with himself. Why did he act like that? It was so not himself.

**Dasha's POV **

" _Stay as you are or stay here and no harm will come to you. Be assure of that."_

My body shivered his touch still lingered on my skin , the place where he had touched was warm ,and his smoky baritone repeated in my mind time and time again as I restlessly lay in my bed. I was stunned. What did Ayanami-sama mean? For the love of God I could not fathom what he wanted to say. It was confirmed. Since that man entered my life my mind had swirled and swirled around him tiring me out, the reason why I did not know. "Ayanami-sama would you answer me?" I whispered dozing into slumber relinquishing in the security his voice and scanty touch had brought me.


End file.
